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Larry, The Downing Street Cat - Media plan for yours truly

Did you know that somewhere in Whitehall, amid the endless committees, briefings, consultations, and cups of tea, officials have apparently been drafting a "media plan" for the eventual departure of yours truly? It's not the cheeriest subject, I grant you. Cats generally prefer to concern themselves with sunshine, naps, and the whereabouts of unattended sandwiches. Nevertheless, I suppose it makes sense to have a plan. After all, when you've spent fifteen years at Number 10 and become something of a national institution, your passing is bound to attract a little attention. I am now 19 years old, which, in cat years, places me somewhere between a distinguished elder statesman and an exceedingly threadbare armchair. As Chief Mouser to the Cabinet Office, I find myself firmly in my twilight years. I have, it must be said, comfortably exceeded the normal life expectancy of the average tabby. Some have suggested this is due to the excellent cuisine available in Downing Street. Those people have clearly never sampled the catering. If longevity really depended on the chef's efforts, I would have been stuffed and mounted years ago. According to the whispers drifting through the corridors, government officials have already prepared press releases, photographs, and graphics for that sad day. My journey began at Battersea Dogs & Cats Home, where some very sensible people rescued me before I was recruited to Downing Street by David Cameron as a pet for his children. Since arriving in February 2011, I have outlasted five Prime Ministers. Quite possibly six by the time you've finished reading this. British politics moves at such a pace these days that a cat can barely fit in a nap between leadership contests. My importance is such that I possess an official biography on the Cabinet Office website. It notes that I am the first cat at Number 10 to hold the title of Chief Mouser and that I was recruited for my hunting abilities and have made a significant impact on the household. That much is true. Mice are considerably easier to manage than politicians. The biography also claims that I have captured the hearts of the British public and that gifts and treats arrive for me daily from admirers across the nation. If so, this comes as news to me. I strongly suspect the staff has been quietly intercepting these offerings before they reach their intended recipient. The treats vanish with such consistency that one might almost think a government department was involved. In any event, there is no need for alarm. Until that distant day arrives, I shall continue my duties as I always have: patrolling the corridors, inspecting visiting dignitaries, ignoring ministers, and maintaining the highest standards of feline indifference. So please, stay calm and carry on. I certainly intend to. #cats #cutecats #pets #aniamls #larrythecat #politics