Larry, The Downing Street Cat - Let Battle commence 🐾

It is one of those secrets so badly kept around Downing Street that even the mice are rolling their eyes. Word has drifted—no, wafted—down the corridors that Andy Burnham, currently Mayor of Manchester and serial political returnee, has announced his intention to slink back into Westminster by contesting the Gorton and Denton by-election. This is not, I should stress, a casual whim, like deciding to rearrange the sofa. Burnham has formally written to Labour’s National Executive Committee asking permission to apply to be the party’s candidate—an act that in politics is roughly equivalent to knocking politely before kicking the door down. Should the NEC agree (and they do enjoy a good, drawn-out deliberation), this could neatly tee up a leadership challenge to my current manservant, Sir Keir Starmer, who already walks with the haunted look of someone who suspects the floorboards are whispering about him. Burnham, long regarded as a man perpetually warming up in the wings, would be stepping onto the stage at precisely the moment when the audience is restless, and the lead actor keeps forgetting his lines. History suggests this rarely ends quietly. For me, of course, the implications are personal. This could mean yet another prime minister passing through my domain, fumbling with the curtains and pretending not to notice the cat judging them from the sofa. By my count, this would make Prime Minister Number Seven. Frankly, I’ve had fewer lives than this government. I shall require a restorative glass of milk and a tuna sandwich to process the news. Possibly two. Politics is exhausting, and I’m not even the one pretending to run the country. 🐾 #cats #larrythecat